If i could turn back the time.

08 January 2015 | 09:30am | JPA_PMU

Hye there...

Its new year 2015. But a very bad started thou. I hope after this will be more better than before. 

From the moment i lay my eyes on you a year ago, i fall in love at the first sight. But i cannot do anything since u seeing someone else that time. I kept my feeling deep inside my heart until that fateful day. I know, best friend cannot fall in love each other, but the feeling is mutual, and i cannot help  it. Texting and sharing problems made me felt so comfortable around you. 

frankly speaking, i totally regret my own actions. im the one suppose to be blame not U. but its already to late, everything that happen cannot be undo. and left both of us hurt .. 

im totally regret to the max. there are no word or even language could describes my feeling right now. i only can recite my own prayer so that u can forgive me. even so u forgive me, the feeling will never be the same again. 

i felt so down ... i couldn't focus on my work.. 

O God, please help through this once again. 

losing you is the most hardest thing happen in my life. people once said "when you lose someone, someone you love, when they break your heart. it's the hardest thing you could ever go through and no matter how much time has passed, it never really goes away. you may think you're getting better, but then you get a flashback, or hear a song that reminds you of a memory, and it hits you all over again, all at once, like a stab in the chest. you fall apart, for the hundredth time. and you feel like you just want to crawl under a rock and never come out. you love this person with all of you heart, even though you know you shouldn't. they hurt you worse than you've ever been hurt. they stole your happiness. but yet, you still want them, and only them. other people come along and give you chances to move on, but you know you don't want to. it upsets you that you might be moving on, because you promised you never would and even if they broke all the promises, you want to keep yours. On top of that you're terrified, terrified of getting hurt again. but it's not like it matters anyway, at the end of the day you're still thinking about the person who has left you completely broken. you don't want to miss them anymore, you don't want to love them anymore, but you know you always will"

Loving you is not a mistake but a blessing from God above. i believe we don't meet people by accident, but they are meant to cross our path for a reasons. 

sometimes i think that maybe we are just another short stories. Like we may as well just be words on a page, because we're only what we've done and what we are going to do. in life we do things. some we wish we had never done. some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads. but they all make us who we are, and in the end they shape every detail about us. 

my life wouldn't be the same without you and all the memories you have given me. If I could turn back the time, i would love to start it all over again, and if it too much to asked, i just want to turn back yesterday evening. 

I felt so terrible sorry... I really really dont meant to hurts u... But its beyond my control, and i should know that, posting regading my anger on social networks are not professional at all... It made me very sad, so so sad... 

I hate myself now.. I really hate myself... People said, time will help us heal, but for me, the scar that i made to you, will remain forever and it will be never fade... No matter how many times i say im sorry it will never change the fate that was happen ... 

I felt im losing myself... 

I know u will never can read this entry, but, if it happen u saw it, i hope u understand, i hope u will forgive me, i hope everything will be fine someday..

When the time is come, i hope we will can be friends again... Just friend. That is all i need.


If i was a mistake, i hope i was your favorite ..  

Till we met again .. 

Tq for the wonderful journey ... 

Tq for all the sweet words...

Tq for the kissed

Tq for the promises

Tq for time

Tq for for everything .. 

your sincerely,

larry cassidy